Saturday, July 9, 2011

Day UGH and UGH AGAIN. Day 3-10

It's getting far more difficult.
To keep the boys brains away from violence.

When I say "violence," let me be clear that I am not talking about domestic or child abuse. Nor thankfully, anything traumatic within my sons lives. You see, I'm trying to "soften" them.

"Pretty dumb to think you can soften boys?"
Yes, I've heard a few fellow "Moms" mention my motives, in that lovely manner.

I'm not trying to soften them for weakness. I'm trying to soften them to increase their strengths.
In the same regard that you enroll your child into Karate, not to become a better fighter, but to soften that urge to fight, and to teach control. I'm pretty sure Karate means, "empty handed fighting."

Speaking of karate, we've enrolled our oldest in Dojo around here.
It is a way to help "soften" his busy boyhood love of dark video games and TV cartoon shows. It is also giving him an outlet, to learn control, obtain confidence, and realize that the best tactics of "violence," are no tactics, just stance. No fights. No fists. Just confidence and the ability to show people that you can control your "urges" or emotions.

So, we've said "No to violence," and "Yes" to Karate. Confusing?
We're teaching our very black and white oldest, that there is in fact a pretty cool gray area in life. We're saying, "we think you spend too much time watching fights, playing fights, and so forth," but "we want you to learn a form of fighting." As that's how most kids see Karate, before becoming a little dragon.
He needed the confidence boost, and it's amazing how well it's working.

So why that first sentence, "it's getting far more difficult?"

Because the outside world, the ones that enjoy teaching, the "Moms" of other little children, seem to make it far more difficult for me, and not just because they "don't get" what the big deal is, and why we have said "no to violence," for the summer.

Who would have thought that at this point, the most challenging of all, would be the other Moms.

Monday, July 4, 2011

Day 3

It's going to be a long summer...

DAY 3.
It's a smidgen more reckless today then the first two days. Perhaps for the same reason when you cease the nicotine the third day and week seem more challenging then the first few.
It's why the muscles hurt a couple of days after starting up exercise.
The brain has sent and received and delivered the message that there isn't any violence, and the muscles are twitching. The brain is stuttering to find itself without the video game nonsense. Without the war games.

It's a stuttering summer of "what do I do now, Mom?"

I find myself having less "alone time," if that's a far statement to make.
I find it very tempting to just say "screw it, here's the controller, go play a video game, or feel free to watch a ninja fighting cartoon on the TV...."

But how will I be able to back up my lecture without proof? If I approach this experiment in the same way I did to help tackle IBS, food journal, I'll be able to look back and see the results.

But first I've got to go forward.

The boys are playing better together--and to think three's a crowd.-- But they're running out of things to do.
At least in their eyes, they are.

It's going to be a long summer....

But not a violent one.